May 11, 2003

Call me Jolene

I have decided that I need a new name.

When I first started this blog (well, actually, when I first started The Blog Formerly Known As Have Fun, Go Mad), I chose "HFGM" as my name. It made sense at the time, as the unique part of the original blog URL was "hfgm", the acronym for Have Fun, Go Mad.

I was trying to make the name as anonymous as possible. Some people have their real names attached to their blogs, some don't. I chose not to.

I find writing to be incredibly terrifying. Even if you're just writing about the boring, mundane goings-on of your daily life, it still feels to me like a little window into your soul. In the past that's part of why I've always hated doing it. When I had to write things in school, I never let anyone except the instructor read what I'd written, if I could help it. Forced peer editing sessions were a form of torture.

Being anonymous sort of takes away a little of the scariness. Kind of like, if they don't know who you are, they can't judge you. I don't know.

With a blog, there's also the issue of certain people you know, ones you didn't want seeing the blog, finding out about it and reading it anyway. It feels like spying. I know, it sounds really paranoid, but you know what they say - just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they aren't trying to kill you.

Anyway.

The thing is, the longer I have this blog, the more I realize how awkward "HFGM" is as a name. Because it's not a name, it's an acronym. You can't address me as "HFGM" without it sounding really weird. Signing my name as "HFGM" doesn't look right either.

So I'm adopting a new name. I shall henceforth be known as "Jolene." No, it's not my real name. It's still anonymous. But it's a hell of a lot less cumbersome than "HFGM." I should have just chosen something like this from the get-go, but I never anticipated how much the non-name would annoy me. The name "Jolene," incidentally, comes from a Cake song of the same name. It's a good song, by a good band.

So, that's it. I'm Jolene now.

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